Daddy's little Girl

I'm such a daddy's girl. Even though sometimes he annoys me, he's still my dad and I wouldnt change that for the world.

~I Believe~

I believe,
that in the darkest of nights, he will be there.
I believe,
that on the bumpiest road, he will be there.
I believe,
that on the coldest days, he will be there.
I believe,
that in the deepest lows, he will be there.

He will be there,
to show me the way.
He will be there,
to help me through.
He will be there,
to keep me warm.
He will be there,
to pick me back up.

between a rock and a hard place

In the last few days a lot has come up. Mostly it's what I should choose to do with my future. I recently found this internship that would be awesome to get, but with that being said. I would have to move, which isn't a bad thing. It would get me out of this small town and I would get to meet new people and make a new life. Ive played this over and over in my head, me looking in the rear view mirror as my small town life shrinks into  distant memories. I can tell you know I'd miss my friends because they have become family to me. But I need to get out of this town or I will never be happy. I feel myself slowly falling apart and turning into someone I'm not and that scares me.

i think the thing I'm most afraid of is being rejected by this internship, because of stupid grades. I may have neglected to mention that school isn't a strong point for me, not that i don't apply myself  I just don't see how you can be graded on certain things as far as creativity, and questions that have no one answer except the one the teacher agrees with as far as their standards and beliefs.

I have decided that in order for me to have a better future i must finish school, and depending on this internship go back to school into a field that is more cut and dry as far as creativeness and it is a profession that i feel i can help people in.

I'm 22 and i have yet to find the purpose of my life or what i truly feel passionate about. I'm stuck on a road that has now just presented a fork and I must choose which way to go. This is by far the hardest decisions I have..

i read some where that when you have a hard decision to make your suppose to flip because the moment that coin its mid air you suddenly know what you're hoping for.

SMILE : )

Just to put a smile on your face today ..  : )

To go, or not to go ....

I live in a small town where everyone thinks they know everything about everyone. even if they've never met you before. It gets annoying pretty fast.

Ive actually been toying with the idea of what my life would be like if I went for an internship in the cities. I know I would love it but what about all my friends. Yes, granted I'd meet new people and find new friends but these friends have been apart of my life for so long its hard to leave them. But i have to think about my future and right now my present isnt making me very happy. I would only be 4 hours away from family/home. which doesnt seem that far but when you look at the big picture and the fact that i work for my dad and see my family every day makes it a little scary.

Dilemma

Today I woke up with a pretty weird look on my life. The first thing I asked myself was "what the hell am I doing?" This may sound weird to you, so here's a little back story. Ive been with this guy for over a year now. We arent dating although we have in a past. For some reason, though, I cant seem to rid my life of him. At times I want to and move on and find the person that completes me, but then I look at where Im at and we all know that ill never find someone in this town that doesnt think they know everything about my life.

I use to say that its just easier to stay with him and keep doing what we're doing because we've been through so much together and he's really the only one that understands what ive been through, but now im beginning to doubt everything. thing is why should i spend my time with him when he cant make a commitment to me?

Thats my dilemma do with it what you want.